Laughter as Medicine
I've noticed that things must be getting better in my little brain, because I've started to laugh more. (Don't worry, the anger, bitterness and tears still come, it's just mixed in with a little gafaw once in a while.) It's been a steady progression throughout the past few months, after having seen very little of it for almost a year. Part of what broke me out of my non-laughing stupor, I think, was going down to visit Chuck in LA a few months ago. He's one of the funniest people I know, and it's pretty much impossible to not laugh around him, given that fact--combined with the fact that we have such a long history. So perhaps I had a little bit of a breakthrough while I was down there--the combination of being out of town, with an old friend, and being around a funny old friend.

But also I'm just feeling more confident with myself in general, and the humor flows from that, sometimes. I find myself making jokes outloud when I'm alone. This is how my humor is, actually--constantly turning over ideas, emotions, phrases, and turning them into something that amuses me. More than any other time in my life, I've become more self-conscious about the number of jokes that fall flat (with others--to me I'm *always* fucking funny). And yet, I'm also starting to once again notice that people do chuckle, and occasionally chortle. And once in a while, I get a gafaw back.

I sometimes wonder--maybe I'm a little bit off that I think it's healthy that I can make jokes (outloud, at times) to myself and get a good laugh...and that I've missed that.


Filed under: Therapy